Did you know that one in three women will experience physical violence, rape or stalking from an intimate partner? What characteristics are common in healthy, unhealthy and abusive relationships? Jessica Muñoz, LCSW, leads us in a discussion using a chart from the National Domestic Violence Hotline’s Website. We compare and contrast healthy, unhealthy and abusive relationships in the following areas: communication, respect, trust, honesty, equality and personal time. You may change a behavior or two after watching the video.
When I was 16 and aggressive drivers cut me off, I thought it showed strength to chase them down, flip them off and cut them off right back. When my friend didn’t pay up on a bet, I thought that charging him a dollar a day interest would teach him a lesson and that giving him the silent treatment would show him who’s boss and give me justice. Instead it led to a cold war between my friend Mike and me that lasted for six months. Oh, how I missed talking to my good friend. I’m grateful for Mike’s dad, who taught me that getting angry on the road takes away from my own happiness, and that good friendships don’t have to end over money. We then listen in as Paul McCartney recounts to James Corden that after his mother died during his teenage years, amidst his grief and fear, that his mother, Mary, came to him in a dream and encouraged him to “Let it Be,” and that everything would be alright. We then join in with Paul and James for our customary Sing Along.
“Where’s Donna?” I panicked. Barry Manilow’s “Jump, Shout Boogie” started blasting over the speakers of the Oakland Interstake Center. “Just start dancing and she’ll come, ” I remember being told. We had practiced for four months and it was the big night. Time passed and I was dancing the swing dance by myself. What do I do? Should I walk off the floor? Have you ever felt abandoned and alone? Have people let you down? What should you do when that happens?
Our lives don’t always unfold the way we wish. Our own mistakes, the behavior of others, illness, accidents and death present obstacles to our own peace and happiness. I share two paintings done by David Errol Penson, and while I like both, I actually prefer the beauty of the imperfect one a little more. Adapting to circumstances, either though the solutions may be unorthodox can lead to a more interesting life. I love to visit baseball stadiums with my friend Steve Fonda. I explain why we prefer the quirky dimensions of Fenway Park in Boston to the perfectly symmetrical dimensions of the old Three Rivers Stadium in Pittsburgh. I share a story from when I was a social worker about how sometimes it’s more important to do what you feel is right, than it is to be perfect.
Adriana Cortes-Kanter, LCSW, returns to explain and even act out a panic attack. She then helps us learn some breathing techniques that help us through a tough time. Negative self talk can really sabotage us and can bring on anxiety. She explains clinical treatment, including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, as well as medication possibilities. Glenn later tells a story of how a panic attack nearly stopped him in his process of becoming a therapist. He self-soothed, changed his thought pattern and regained his confidence. Victor Thompson’s sing along then takes us the the White, Sandy Beach of Hawaii.
Joanne McCluskey, MSW, ACSW, joins me and shares three meaningful quotes about depression, including: “Depression lies. It tells you you’ve always felt this way, and you always will. But you haven’t, and you won’t.” (Halley Cornell) We discuss the challenges of depression, and help those that deal with it, or have family members that do, understand it. In Episode 8, Joanne returns to help us learn to manage depression through self-care and self-love.
